The Struggle is Real

One thing that really gets me demotivated in my creative goals is my lack of creativity when I try to force it. Its like if I make a conscious decision to be creative, I've got nothing and then in the middle of doing something I can't just stop I have a creative thought or moment and then its lost, lost forever, because I can't capture it. I know I sound a bit dramatic about all of it but it really does bring me down, makes it hard to try and do creative things in my spare time, I feel like I'm forcing it and therefore its not real or raw. . . I sound like a broken record, an artist that has never starved.  I've never put my artwork or writing first, ever. Its always been low on my priority list and why I wonder? I love it, I should spend more time on it.  I promised myself this year will be the year that I make it more of a priority, this is the year I accomplish many things, why, because I am making a promise to myself and I am not going to break it.  I've been listening to Rachel Hollis's book Girl, wash your face on audible and she made me realize this. I've got to hold myself accountable for not letting myself make time for the things I love like writing and painting.  I've also got to get over the fact that people may not read my blog or the books I want to write and people may not want to buy my paintings or anything else but that doesn't mean I should stop doing what I love.  You know the saying...'The Struggle is Real" This is on of my real struggles. 😂